Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

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I like school Said no one ever.

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Why didn't the cat play with the ball of yarn? It was drowned in a toilet.

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Ask me if i'm a serial killer Are you a serial killer? Yes and I killed your family

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This Anti-Joke is funny. haha.

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What's moist wet and I put my finger in it? My nose.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Irune. Irune who? Irune my life with all this red sand.

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There is a boy in a school............. SUDDENTLY, PEDOBEAR APPEARS!

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Why was the potatoe hot Cuz I cooked it

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What is white, sticky, and something that gay people and women love? Frosting.

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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why did the chicken cross the road? because colonel sanders was chasing it with an axe

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Whats worse than your house on fire? an orphanage catching on fire. Whats wosre than an orphanage catching on fire? A bunny farm catching on fire.

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Who enforces the law strongly and forces people to obey them? Terrorists that have seized control of a town.

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How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

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I like playing in the balls. I like balls.

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What did the underprivileged girl get for Christmas? Nothing because Santa Claus is a media generated holiday icon and the real St. Nicolas has been deceased for almost 700 years.

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Matthew Baker

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Why was Helen Keller deaf, blind, and a woman? She was a bad driver.

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Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

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When Kurt Cobain was little, his mother told him to never play with guns but I guess it went through one ear and out the other.

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why did the little boy fall down?? Because a terrorist shot him

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Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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