Why did the kid fall over? He was hit by a car

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Roses are red, pink, white or yellow. Stop stereotyping my arrogant fellow.

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A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

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So a guy walks up to a gay guy and says: "You are a fag." The gay guy says: "That is very offensive, you jerk." So the guy says: "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know what it meant" and the gay guy says: "I accept your apology." Then the gay guy crosses the street and gets hit by a bus

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All the planets are named after gods Ours is named after dirt....

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, it's impossible to determine the motivations of an animal that is incapable of speech.

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So there's this guy, and he's trying to screw in a lightbulb, right? Well, he did it. Hoorah. His wife was proud.

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slaughter the mussies #EDL

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Opinions are like assholes. I'm not sure how they are alike, but that seems to be the general consensus.

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What's worse than dividing by zero? Chuck Norris dividing your face!

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masturbating on a tarc bus

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The president is invited to a party at Bill's house. Suddenly the house catches on fire. Who survived? No one, they all died.

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Is your refrigerator running? If so, you are on drugs, and should see help.

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What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus is? Trying not to laugh.

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As he stood in her front yard with a boombox in the pouring rain, she leaned her head out the window with a smile and he was electrocuted.

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Whats the difference between a Corvette and 1000 dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

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What did lil' Suzy do when she got home from school? She was violently mutilated by a bear then continually but raped by a man she met on the Internet. Needless to say, she had a great time. -Harrison

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What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

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A blind man walks into a bar and orders a beer. He has gotten used to being blind all his life.

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What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A dead panda.

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What is worse than getting hit by a car? Getting hit by a truck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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