Why was Helen Keller depressed? She was deaf and blind.

Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? Ones fun to jump on, the others just a trampoline.

A man was wacking it and then his internet went down he then cut off his own balls then his internet came back

What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

What's more fucked up that the Bill Cosby rape accusations? Sam and Adele's shower time on a Wednesday night

How many fish does it take to brush their teeth? Jp's worth of fish isn't enough.

Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

James Patrick Campbell

I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

[] [] Those are eyes These are teeth

Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

What did the Doctor say to the patient. You have AIDS The patient took out a machete and stabbed the Doctor. The Doctor died. Two weeks later, the patient died of AIDS.

Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

Q:What do you call a wizard who flies? A: A flying wizard.

What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

A man walked into his house He saw his wife having an affair with his teenage Gardner

So a baby seal walks into a club...

Whats funnier then a dead baby? A lot of things.

My friends new nickname is hawk-eye! He is a jackass...

How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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