Three men are facing a firing squad. They are all promptly executed. Even if they were to escape by distracting the executioners, they would no doubt be shot down before they could get for.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get him a ladder and help him down.

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How many Russians can you fit in a Mini Cooper? It depends on how big they are.

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What do you call a man who's being followed by 18 black guys? Dave, he's going to work and is stuck in traffic

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what do you call a black clerk? one of the 2 billion people with a job, u bum!

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Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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All these jokes are very entertaining, but if you look closely, Lebron clearly travels. Wheres the call ref what the hell.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cause 7 was a petophile and 6 has four children

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Benjamin Frankin was playing with his Xbox...

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja

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What do you get when you put Star Wars and Disney together? A Bad Sequel

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there once was a frog with no leggs

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What's brown, sticky, green, yellow, and orange that rides a unicycle? I have no clue, that's why I asked.

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Knock knock, Who's there? The constable. Your husband was killed in a car crash.

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one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

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A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse didn't respond, because it's a horse.

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Why was the boy sad? His cookies are gone.

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Do you know why I am excited? I don't know I'm asking you.

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police, mam. We need to speak to you about your son Robert. It's the police, mam. We need to speak to you about your son Robert who? Mam, he was in an accident. Could you open the door please?

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Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops