Funny names Alec Balls Isaac Balls Dick Hedd Willy lickerr Lydia Stick Gaylord Sugar Fanny Gouger

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One day, a mother was speaking with her daughters. "Mommy," the first one said, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we brought you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second daughter said, "Why did you name me Rose?" ""Because when we brought you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMBWWAAAAGGGH!" the last daughter cried. She was born with severe special needs and is incapable of coherent speech.

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A man walked into a bar. He got a head trauma and committed suicide.

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So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

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Q: Why can you not thumb up your own comment? A: "You've already voted" douche...

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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5 people are walking

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What did the giraffe say to the human? Nothing, but it was trying to alert the human of an oncoming bus.

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What does it mean when you have big shoes? Either you were genetically born with big feet, or you are wearing sheos that are too big for you.

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if girls witth big boobs work at hooters where does the girl with one leg work.... walmart

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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roses are red violet is blue sugar is sweet f*ck you im a moon

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What is a vampire's favorite desert? Assuming they are real I dont think they would enjoy it in the daylight, so really there's no point.

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4 people: A pilot, Bill Gates, the Pope, and a little kid, are all on an airplane with only 3 parachutes, when the plane's engine explodes and starts to go down. But the pilot makes an emergency landing at a nearby airport and everybody is okay.

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Why did Santa go to a rap concert? Because Santa was a rapper

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What's better than seeing a Detroit Lions game? Not being in Detroit.

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In some aspects, a fowl can be compared by many points to the Tyrannosaurus. But it is still comestible.

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Two fish are sitting in a tank. One says, "I'll man the guns. You drive."

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What's the difference between a black guy and a bench. A bench is wooden while a black guy has a human body composed of mostly water.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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Why was the black man in the hotel so upset? I shit on his chest.

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Why didn't the oven turn on? Because nothing turned it on.

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Did you know that if you get all your intestines, and laid it out across the floor in a line, you would die?

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This joke is not funny, So don't read it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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