- Anti Joke

Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

A man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots, "Long day?", the bartender asks. "Yeah", the man replies, then he goes home and hangs himself

what did sandy say to mr krabs nothing squirles are not smart enough to make a air tank and go under water

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Why do everytime I go to toilet for number 2. I look into the toilet to see if this one's nicer than the last one.

What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

What did the skeleton say when he was horny? Nothing. Skeletons are not living and therefore cannot be horny.

How many jews can fit into a car? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, 6 million in the ash tray

Why did Daphie die? I stabbed her 487 times.

Why was the man full? He ate a meal.

What's the difference between a jew and a jew? They both died in the gas chamber.

Is this the krusty krab? No, this is Patrick

if quizzes are quizzical, arent tests testical?

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

A man walks into a bar Ouch He broke his penis So he ate it Then he saw a little boy They shaved their pubic hair together He raped the little boy He walked into another bar Double ouch

Why can't Tommy ride a bike? Because Tommy is a goldfish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new piano? Neither has he...

What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots? It depends on what his name is.

bryden is a faggot

Why did the chicken cross the road? 4

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Losing a family member in 9/11.

How do you stop your baby crawling in circles? Pick it up and smother it.