What did God say to Noah? "Hi."

thumb_up thumb_down +20

roses are red violets are blue i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Mindfuck: They call you a patient where medics are because they do not want you to become impatient. The Coronel is the Kernel of the army (coronel sounds a lot like coronel no?) Sergeant = Sir gent. as in Sir gentle(man) Ok, so if you experience insanity one day, does that make you insane forever? In that case I was born and will die hungry and thirsty. Sigmund Freud= Sickman fraud. General: The guy you should generally listen to if you are in the army. 3.14 ratebay = PIRATE BAY! Why is Satan the antichrist, humans killed him :P Satan only "tempted his thirsty brother with water at the desert" Jesus showed real power by saying "NO WATER WHEN I AM THIRSTY IS BAD FROM MY BROTHER!"

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How do you kill a 6'5 black man in a dark alley? Stab him 3 times in the appendix with a 12 inch blade.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why was the white man rich and the black man poor? Because when the white man was 11 and he didn't have a job because 11 year olds don't get hired, because its not legal, he use to pick up pennies. And when the black man was 11 he got a job mowing lawns and ended up being a lawyer graduate and spent the rest of his life paying off his school loan. The white man lived in the 70's and the black man lived in he twentieth century.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock kock ding dong ding di-ding dong zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh weeeeeeeeeewooooooooooooooooo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz hey yo wake up zzz-oh-huh-what-whos there i've been yelling for like five minutes oh sorry jim will you let me in already all right

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A Black man a Chinese man and a Jew walk in to a bar. Black man: nice place they got here Asian man: yeah I remember when it used to be that old hardware store Jew: Henry's, i think it was called Aisian man: must have been there for at least 10 years or so

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what's red, blue, and white all over? The American Flag

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did i drink 4 sodas? Because i was thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How can you confirm that Saturday comes after friday, and that Sunday comes after Saturday? consult Rebecca Black.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 3

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A: B: No pun intended.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the asian man crash into the stop sign? Because there was a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

your mother hates you

thumb_up thumb_down +18

- Knock knock - I have a doorbell

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's the difference between a black man and a white man, a white man has lighter skin

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Penis penis poop butt

thumb_up thumb_down +18

a man is bussy at work, when he gets called by his doctor. YOUR WIFE IS HAVING A BABY! the doctor yells. so the man runs to his car, drives home like a madman, and arrives home with his doctor holding the newborn in his arms. "congratulations" the doctor says "it's a boy" the man takes the baby in his arms and says: "but, this child is black!" his wife cheated on him and the familly breaks appart

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Jack and Jill climbed up the hill .... and fetched a pail of water.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

19th amendment

thumb_up thumb_down +16

68

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops