Why is John gay? Because he enjoys the penis

What is big, red, and beats rocks? A big, red, rock beater.

Why was the women's basketball player laughed at. The slippery floor caused her to stumble and fall.

A man walks into a bar and says "hey, it's me!". Turns out that wasn't him.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a bin lorry

wanna hear a joke: women's rights

Whats easier to fit in a trunk, babies or concrete bricks? Babies because you can hit them with a pitchfork.

What's worse than dropping your ice cream cone? Man's inhumanity to man.

Do you ride the bus to school or do you take your lunch?

What's round and red? A red and round solid.

What did the young boy get for christmas? Parental divorce

why was 6 afraid of 7? He's not.

What is sad about a kid dying in a bus accident? The other 20 survived

How do you make a homeless man cry? you throw away his trash.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, And I'm blind.

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

What did the Asian bookkeeper say to the Jewish dog? I love you

Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

Enchilada

so one day i was getting my daughter artemisia ready for school and so i came in her room and got her pants and so i put it on and then i said did you grow during the summer really did you and then she said daddy both of my feet are stuck on one side of the leg

A duck flies to someone's backyard pool. Moments later it takes a dump , then suddenly flies away.

How do you stop 5 black guys from raping a girl? You call the proper authorities. Don't try to be a hero.

It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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