A Black man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder and the bar tender says " thats something weird you got there". The parrot says "yeah i found it on the street".

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jelly ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

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A baby elephant steps on a lego. First thought, auch, huh ?! Actually, the lego was fine with it and so was the baby elephant. Now they're married and are expecting a baby legophant.

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A man walks by with a bat. A little girl crosses the street. He hits her with it because she is a little shit. A homeless atheist sees and reports it immeaditately to the authorities because it was child abuse.

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whats funny? laughing at people when they die a slow and painful death.

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Why didn't the little boy believe in Santa Clause? Because' he saw his parents putting presents under the tree, and saw his over weight father eat all the cookies.

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A marine biologist is captured by a group of violent pirates. After hours of being tortured, the pirates make him walk the plank. As he is pushed on to the plank, they ask him for his one last request. He responds "Kill yourselves." The pirates proceed to stab themselves until they bleed out and the marine biologist is the last man on the boat.

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A cow was very inconveniently standing in the middle of a golf course. An alligator dragged the cow into a swamp. The cow dies

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what is the only death better than asama bin ladin JUSTIN BIEBER'S

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

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How do you keep someone in suspense? I'll tell you tomorrow.

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fart+fart=poop

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- What has 2 legs and is bleeding ? - A dog cut in two.

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Wieners? A: Nothing. your last name is a male sex organ

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see his brother im dying of leukemia.

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Win and Beau have no friends

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What's worse than a stain on your carpet? Two stains on your carpet

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Ring. Ring. Hello? Hey, It's Sean Oh hi! How are you?

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names...

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How can you put 2 elephants in a bottle without touching each other. You put an elephant between them.

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There are two muffins in an oven. One says nothing. Muffins can't talk.

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"Knock Knock!" "Who's Their?" "Mew" "Mew Who?" "Mew Two Stupid! Get yo Pokemon FACTS Right!" "Mew Two Proceeds to walk away in distress"

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Why did the father beat his daughter? To alleviate stress.

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Weiner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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