I dumped this chick who was cross eyed. I thought she was seeing other people.

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What did one mail box say to the other? NOTING! In-animate objects cannot speak...

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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What's worse than being hit by a mini van? Being hit by 5 mini vans.

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Roses are red violets are blue you're the middle child no one cares about you

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Good.

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How do you stop the skunk from smelling, you rip it in half and bury the body therefore stopping the smells from escaping.

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a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: why the long face? he has cancer

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A black man walks into a book store.

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Wanted: A tall, well built woman with good reputation, who can cook Frog's legs, who appreciates a good Fuc- shia garden, classical music and tal- king with out getting too serious. Now read only lines 1,3, and 5

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http://anti-joke.com/

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Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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Will you marry me?

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Q. What happened when a mouse ran up the clock and it struck 12? A. It fell off and got raped by an 80 year old Asian lady with breast cancer

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A Japanese man walks into a bar, it collapses and then is demolished by a tsunami.

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A woman walks out of the kitchen.

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How many elephants can you fit in a car? Five. Two in the front, two in the back, and one in the glove compartment.

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How do you catch a unique rabbit? You could probably find many of them in the vicinity of Chernobyl. The radiation has probably created thousands of mutations. They are probably not as fast as regular rabbits.

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Why, if you are blending a baby, should you put it in feet first? So you can look in to it's eyes when masturbating.

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A Rabbi, a Priest, and an Atheist walk into a restaurant. They receive terrible service, and do not leave a tip.

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2 muffins are in the oven. After about 15 minutes, they both died.

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What do you give a small child when you don't have any candy? Nothing, you just kidnap them.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had alopecia.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 1, 2 in mod7.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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