Hey, name is Anita, I am Nero`s nurse, he told me to say that if you wish to speak any further, you are going to have to call him and prove you are not some guy. Say Tifa, do you ever play videogames?

What is wrong with this phrase? The next line is false. The first line is true. Answer: llamas

What did the 3 bears say when they saw goldielocks sleeping in their bed? Nothing. Bears can't talk so they ate her.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' cheese

Bobby walked into a bar. He was then escorted out of the bar and arrested because he was underage.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

A: Knock knock (pause) A: Knock knock (pause) A: Knock knock B: (frustrated), I thought we had that damn thing fixed!!!

Why does Santa go down your chimney? Because he is to retarded to use the door.

What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

Why do witches ride on brooms? Because they have magical powers!

Why did the man die from drinking the water? It wasn't water, it was acid.

how do you make a family tan? You burn them in the house.

The 13th Amendment...

Q: why are black people good at basketball? A: because they practice

What do u call a black guy with a gun? A police officer u racist bastard

Chuck Norris.

Whats brown and sticky? Anal sex

A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

what do you do when a woman tells you no? cut her tongue out

Why did the Nazi not help the black man up after he had been badly injured? The Nazi was in a wheelchair.

Dani Barton is a heart breaking 13 yr old.

connor sucks

Why did the lizard turn blue? He was low on oxygen.

What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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