What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa is a jolly Christmas figure that delivers presents to children and Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

Knock Knock Who's there? The visitor is deaf and therefore does not have the ability to respond.

Kid: Hey,can i have all the answers to this test please. Teacher: What the hell kid im the fricken teacher.

Why did the cookie go to the docter? Because he was dieing of terminal cancer.

What do you call an asian guy in a police uniform? A police officer.

What do you call a Jew in Harlem? It depends on what his name is. I advise procuring a polite introduction from a mutual acquaintance.

Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Im Really Stoned And you have met with a terrible fate haven't you?

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Wha'ts Slippery when wet? A Wet Slipper.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuse 7 was a convicted serial killer. >----->

Adolf Hitler was a humanitarian.

Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

knock knock who's there? Barbra Streisand Barbra Streisand who? Barbra? Streisand whoo oo oooo oo oo oo ooo ooo!

HAHA SO ONE TIME... The man could not finish his story because he gets shot, and is mourned for years. His daughter was watching it all. She then jumped. And fell. And broke her knee. And then died. yeah

Your mamas so fat. She fat.

Q: How do you get a one armed blond of of a tree? A: You grab a ladder and help her down safely.

Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

A squirrel got killed by getting hit by a truck haha its funny cuz the squirrel died

What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

Yourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr soo uglyyyyyy

What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

two men are walking and nobody falls becouse they use a power balance

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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