Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was about to get raped.

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A guy walks into a bar. He puts an icepack on his head so it doesn't swell, and decides to go out for a drink. He walks into a bar and thinks to himself, "that's twice today, maybe I should just go home."

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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Where did Jimmy go after the bombing? Everywhere.

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Q: Whats better than getting raped by a dog? A: Getting raped by a cat.

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for his birthday? Broken arms and legs

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What did Tarzan say when the monkeys came over the hill? Hey look, the monkeys are coming over the hill.

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What smells like marjuana and is black? A black man smoking weed

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How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was thrown out of the way

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viki has 10 penises around her she eats 8 of them what does viki have? viki has AIDS

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Hellen Keller

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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It's your mother, open the door.

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What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

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Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

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What was the dying Raccoons last words? I don't want to die.

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Do you want to hear a joke? Well, I do too.

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Oh, I must be hearing things.

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

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What is the square root of 69? 8.306623863

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Whats long and hard on a black man..... 2nd grade

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Why didn't the boy run the marathon? He was cripple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops