In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Why don't you ever want to greet your friend Jack on the plane? Because your wife cheated on you with him and she is having his baby, if you were to even think about talking to Jack, you'd end up slitting his throat and throwing him off the side of the plane into a crocodile pit where they will make a feast of his body for the next couple days... So just don't greet Jack

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What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

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Why do women love Panera Bread? They think it's healthy.

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What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

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Who's mean and white and really not nice? Hitler

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Why did a man throw butter out the window ? So he could see butter fly and then realized that there was one on window cil

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Why did the mans nuts itch he had crabs

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why was the woman in the kitchen? because societal standards placed her in such a situation

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Why did the cow fall Cause a fat kid pushed him over

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There is a bunch of penguins and they fall of a cliff

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a guy was waiting for his date, then she arrived and they went happily to the cinema

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whats brown and sticky? Doody

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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God is real.

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Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

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What do you call a Fly with no wings? Dead.

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whats short blonde and speaks spanish? my spanish teacher Mrs. Inman

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Wha'ts the difference between Justin Beiber and a piece of hot muff garbage? Fart triscuits.

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

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i like turtles

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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why did the blonde put on a coat? because she was cold.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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