Q: Why was the blonde so dumb? A: Because she wasn't properly educated.

What do you do when you come to a fork in the road? You take it

A black man walks into a bar, to get a drink.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

A penguin walks into a bar and orders a beer................ PENGUINS DON'T WALK OR TALK

what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

>>-------------[Knee]---------->>>

Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

Why is it wrong to love your neighbour? You would be loving a dickhead.

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

What's brown and sticky? A stick

Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? 1, just because their Jewish doesn't mean their incapable of changing a lightbulb.

What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

If life hands you lemons Take them

Oh hey is your dad good at golf? No, he's not really good at anything except lying.

Q:Whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead baby? A:The dog has skidmarks in front of it -RDV

Exactly what?

How do porcupines have sex? The male begins by urinating all over the female. He then enters her from behind and proceeds to thrust until the act is completed.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

knock knock who's there? the police you are wanted for 5 counts of 1st degree murder.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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