Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A:Because it wa dead!!!!!!

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all broke beyond repair.

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A jewish boy walks past a quarter on the ground..

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42

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knock knock come in ok!!!!! ur an elephant oh ya i guess im not suppose to talk!

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What has four legs one head but only one foot? A dog that was born with physical deformities.

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What did the red paint say to the blue paint? They said nothing. Paints don't talk and you need to see a doctor if you answered anything else.

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Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

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What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

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What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

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A black man walks into a bar. He is then beaten upon and hung, as this is the 50s.

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Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? everything! dead monkeys are awesome

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What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Be sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

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What do you say to Jews at a synagogue? Hitler is coming

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If you just read this, You're dead.

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why is 6 scared of 7? because 7 eight 9

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Who will win in a fight Chuck Norris or Chuck Norris? I don't even know who he is -Lets go METS!!!!!!

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How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

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What is blue and roles about on the floor A baby playing with a plastic sack

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Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

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whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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