Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

Why did the girl fall of her bike? Because she got hit by a fridge!

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What the **** did i just do? I have no clue......

why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

My friends told me they found a dead women....they said they pissed on her........that was my mom

A carpenter walks into a bar. After ordering some wine he tells the bartender that one of his 12 friends will betray him. He also says that once he was captured, the government will execute him on a wooden cross for everyone to see. The bartender in disbelief says to the man "You gotta be kiddin' me, do you think you're Jesus or something?" The man throws his glass of wine to the floor, grabs the bartender by his collar, and says "Hey man, I ordered red wine, not white wine you bastard!" After a few minutes, a group of nurses escort the insane loon back to the mental clinic. The bartender never saw the man again and proceeds to sweep that mess the psycho left on the floor.

Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

What did the elf say to Santa I'm not making any more toys fat ass.

What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

What is the best thing the French ever invent The two piece

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

What does society have in common with laundry? They both get ruined when you mix colors with whites.

You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

Hey, I just met you And this is scabies So I'm prescribing you some permethrin.

Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

Why was the little boy reluctant to approach his father? Because his father was a rotting corpse.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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