Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

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Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

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Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

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what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

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Double-whammy

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whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

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Why did the Fly die? Cause it died the average life span is 30 days.

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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Your mother smells so bad that if she were alive in 1919 she would most likely be outlawed in the Geneva Convention or at least banished from conventional warfare among nations that adhere to the restrictions imposed by such a document

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

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"The only thing worse than being talked about is getting AIDS." -Oscar Wilde

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Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

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Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

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What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

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Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He was killed in action and his family misses him terribly.

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Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the chicken!

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Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

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Why did the duck turn black? an oil spill

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

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A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops