Why did the black man get arrested? He didn't pay child support for his 12 bastard children

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Why couldn't the blind man see his friend? He was behind him.

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Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

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Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

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What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

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A Jew and a Muslim are playing golf. Just not together.

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when chuck norris does a pushup, he is tearing the muscles in his biceps, deltoids, core, and triceps in order to make them stronger.

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What's brown and smells like poo? Poo.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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Why couldn't the Muslim eat pork? He didn't have a tongue.

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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Ebola

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Your momma is so fat that she could benefit from loosing a couple of pounds.

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Roses are dead Violets are too Were all gonna die So are you.

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Have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. It's okay, neither has he.

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What is funnier than an anti-joke? My SAT scores.

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Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

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"Whats that boy? Timmy fell down the well??" Bout time

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How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Did you hear the one about the koala bear that fell out of the tree? Yeah it died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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