24

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's 9 + 10 19 AB

thumb_up thumb_down +5

So a man walking down a nature trail came across an injured fox laying on the ground in pain, it looked like it was attacked recently. There wasn't much the man could do at the time, so he gently picked up the fox and rushed the fox to his house. The man arrives moments later at his house with the fox. There were a lot of options the man could choose, but he went with a simple recipe. The man grabbed a knife and gutted the fox, removing all unnecessary organs. He then skinned the fox of it's fur. He sliced the head off, cut the legs to a stub, and stuffed it. He gave it a nice seasoning and placed it in the oven at about 350F for 6 hours. When the fox was perfectly cooked, it was taken out of the oven and left to sit for about 5 minutes to cool. He cut a chunk of meat from the dish and sat down to eat. "What a fine meal" the man said.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did red say to yellow? Move over orange is coming now.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Tin is a chemical element with symbol Sn (for Latin: stannum) and atomic number 50. It is a main group metal in group 14 of the periodic table. Tin shows chemical similarity to both neighboring group-14 elements, germanium and lead, and has two possible oxidation states, +2 and the slightly more stable +4. Tin is the 49th most abundant element and has, with 10 stable isotopes, the largest number of stable isotopes in the periodic table. It is a silvery, malleable other metal that is not easily oxidized in air, obtained chiefly from the mineral cassiterite where it occurs as tin dioxide, SnO2.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

There were 3 men on a rough each granted one wish to make. The first guy sees a bird and runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a bird and he flies away. The second guy sees a butterfly so he too runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a butterfly and flies away. The third guy telling himself those were all stupid wishes, makes up his mind what he is going to wish for so he runs to the ledge and just after he says "I wish to be" he trips on the ledge and says, "shit!" So his wish was granted and shit he became. The End.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What color is the grass on Bob's lawn? Bob lives in a apartment.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man gets a new job working for his boss. Later, he beats his boss in a fight, quits his job, and starts his own business. Historians later concluded that the man's life would serve as a perfect national allegory for the USA.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's 18 inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yo' mom is so fat, She should probably consider a low fat diet in which no more than 30% of the calories are from fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How tall is oprah.. 5'7

thumb_up thumb_down +5

None of the sex jokes are not funny or not funny. They're just inappropriate.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

French man: Bonjour! English man: um, i am not french! french man: oh, My chat is on this beautiful country! Her name is Valentina! English man: What you poo in the open and name them?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock knock Whos there? Sorry, wrong house,goodbye!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q:what does your face and this site have in common? A:both are poorly constructed

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops