- Anti Joke

What did santa claus get the boy with cancer for christmas? Nothing. Santa is not real and thus incapable of granting christmas wishes.

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

What is computers and smells like thin and fragile? dyslexic nipples.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because no cars were coming.

What glows in the dark and is really annoying? A glow in the dark chimpanzee

Q:where does baby oil come from? A:Only the finest of babies

What's the difference between Santa and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney.

We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

Roses are red violets are blue im a schizophrenic and i am too.

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

THAT AWKWARD MOMENT... nuff said

A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Which way do 5 gay guys walk? Depends on where they're planning to go.

Why is Michael Jackson bad at checkers? Cause he's dead.

What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

A man walks into a bar. He's just entered into the Twilight Zone.

the NAACP

Did you hear about the new XBOX releasing in Mexico. It's called the XBOX JUAN!!!

How did the rock cross the road? It didn't cause it's a rock.

Why did the monkey cross the road? Because he saw the chicken do it.