Ich bin nicht der Anführer

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whats the difference between a ferrari in my garage, and a pile of dead babies in my garage. I do not have a ferrari but i do have a pile of dead babies

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Why did Sally dance and record it on Vine? She did it for the Vine

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Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

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How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

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I have a great knock knock joke. You start. Go.

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Why isn't Pluto a planet? Because it mutilated my dog

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME

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Why does an ostrich have such a long neck? Because its head is so far from its body.

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How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

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What did the giraffe say to the other giraffe. Nothing, giraffes are animals and thus cannot speak

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If I was, yet this syndicate was a legal one, necessary in order to maintain world peace trough the means of economical stability and such, would this be acceptable to you? Hypothetically of course.

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why did the chicken cross the road because it wanted to get hit by a car

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What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside. A BMW doesn't have pricks on it's bodywork, for a multitude of reasons: - it would increase the coefficient of drag, causing an increase in fuel consumption - the pricks would fall foul of pedestrian safety regulations

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a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

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Why was the phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts!

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Whats sad about a black man killing himself? That shaft DVD that he rented will probably be late now.

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what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it tastes good.

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Why did the Muslim boy crash a plane into a building? Because the remote-controlled plane suddenly malfuctioned and crashed into a nearby apartment complex.

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what do you call people who keep reffering to the holocost , and cancer sufferers on this site? sad and sick individuals

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why did the boat float up to the sky? because everybody on it died including the boat...

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So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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