How many ants are in the kitchen? None. We killed them all.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

whats funnier then a joke on anit jokes pracitcally anything cause anti jokes repaeats and everyone has herd them

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

There was an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman. Now there's millions of them. And women too.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

will you like this joke my sources say no

thumb_up thumb_down -31

I'm on a see food diet- it consists of fish and molluscs. sea*

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What do you do when you're surrounded by 15 vampires and 15 werewolves? Stop pretending.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Q: what is the most confusing day in the ghetto? A: fathers Day

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What is black and has no education A tire.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What is green and has wheels???? Yo mamma on a Wednesday.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Democracy.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why couldn't the fan turn on? Because it was broken.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

how do you get a nun pregnant? have unprotected SEX with her, resulting in expulsion from her convent

thumb_up thumb_down -31

…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

thumb_up thumb_down -31

why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

thumb_up thumb_down -33

how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

why wont chin ever take his hat off because his head will be cold

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did the old man get wet even though he was using an umbrella? Because it didn't save from falling off the bridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops