What do silly people in a monastery say? stop munkying around.

What happened to the Jewish man while he was in the shower? He accidentally fell asleep and was late to his job.

Why are women so obsessed with not having penises? I'm serious. Imagine an ordinary woman out there, who is not doing any of the activities that the women-not-having-penises thing is famous for. But I can pretty much guarantee that under her clothes at that very moment, she isn't having a penis. And for no good reason. Sometimes I suspect women keep up the no-penis thing even in their sleep. Frankly, I find that creepy. Why are women so obsessed with not having penises?

So let's pretend two men that had been friends for a very long time, one man asks the other man how he is, so the man tells the other man how he is doing. Then that man asks the other man how he is doing. The two men were engaged in a very interesting conversation. What did the men do next? Nothing. We're pretending, remember?

A guy walked into a restaurant. He sat down and had a lovely meal left the restaurant got in his car and went home. The End

Why did the black man cross the road? To rape the girl on the other side.

Q: What Did Alakazam Use To Listen Gangnam Style? A: He Used Psybeam.

How do you stop a bus? throw a boy with an ice cream cone infront of the bus. but...come to think of it, that may not work. he might drop the ice cream on top of it >:l

Q: Why was it bad to be a black jew during the Holocaust? A: You had to sit at the back of the gas chamber

What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the beer from the other man and throws it on the floor, breaking it. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's Black

A priest was walking home from church one day when he found a young boy crouching naked in the bushes. The priest contacted local law enforcement authorities on his cell phone and proceeded home once they arrived.

There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

where's mom I killed her

why did the circus boy not do his homework? because he was in a coma.

What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

Q: How many jews can you fit in a car? A: Well, it varies on the size of the car and the size of the people entering the car so in reality there is no clear answer due to the lack of information given.

What did the ant do? I don't care you whore

Why was a white man mowing his lawn ? The lawn was getting undesirably long which provoked the white man.

Me - Ask me if I am a Frog. You - Are you a Frog? Me - No.

Yo mama is so old, the bone structure of her spine has decayed significantly since she stopped growing and has therefore shrunken in height considerably. Her face and hands have accumulated abundant visual wear; wrinkles, and has arthritis as well.

why did logan cross the road? to get raped by his father again

There is a law in california that says that women are not allowed to drive with house coats.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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