2 persons in an elevator then, one guy says: dude! smells like your sister! and the other guy is not there

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Knock Knock, Who's There? The The Who? YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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what do you call a black lawyer? a very well educated black man

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An Irishman, Scotsman and Englishman were jumping into well because they were told whatever they shouted when they fell they landed on. I lied and they died, hehe

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What do you call a black man wearing tights? Rick

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How do you make someone sad? Tell them they have cancer

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Why were accents created? So when people go to Texas they come back sounding like a D-Bag.

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Hey. I came up with an anti-joke. I posted it here.

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420

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

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I don't know about the rest of you, but I HATE funerals.

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So a Jewish Family wakes into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

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Why did John McCain lose the election? He did not get as many votes as Barack Obama.

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Whats black and white and read all over? A dead magpie.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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i just pooped that is all!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i have Alzheimers, Roses are red

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

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"Your invited!" "Invited to what?" "I can't tell but everybody you know." " He he."

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Stephen Hawkins walks into a bar...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops