What's ugly and has shit smeared over its teeth? Smelly McD (He also wears bin bag clothes)

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What is worse than the holocaust Nothing it was fine with the Jews in camps burning and dying

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that's just been shot.

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

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What did the orphan get christmas? CANCER

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Why did the Jewish population diminish in the '40s? Showers and Ovens

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A bear and a furry bunny rabbit were in the woods. The bear ate the rabbit..

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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what do u do if a women serves you lunch in the living room? u tighten the chain!!!!!!

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Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

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Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by jimmy savile.

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Why didn't the vampire go to the Garlic festival? Because it sucks.

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What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless

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Guess what I was with your mom last night so I wraped her in foil and put her in the oven.

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What are the similarities between aaron ash and a cow? they both have 7 stomachs.

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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I hate it when people pour my cereal. They don't know how much I want. They don't know my life. They don't know what I've been through.

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I am in love with pizza. It was a friday night and i was hanging around with my so called friends 'banana-rama' 'pearman' and 'peaches' (keep in mind these are all fruit). I ordered a pizza from Poker Pizza and it came an hour later i brung it to my kitchen and i opened the box. It was lovely. I eat it, i soon realized that I had eat my one true love and decided to order another pizza.

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A Mexican man, an American man, and an Italian man go to a bridge. The mexican said "we have too much of this in our country!" and throws pasta into the water. The Mexican man says "we have to much of this in out country!" and throws a taco into the water. The American throws in the Mexican man and says "we have to much of these in our country!"

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A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's treehouse? No. It's quite nice, her father made it himself.

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What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops