I dont usually get jokes, but when i do I get them.

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So there is two clowns. Pickle and Jim. If you were asked who was funnier, you would probably say pickle. Well you would be wrong. It's Jim.

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hi penis ham telephone

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Why did Visellet stop eating cherries? Because she choked on a pit and died.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Interrupting Owl." "Interrupting Owl who?"

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What was the babies first word? Nothing: It was a still-born.

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What is the difference between a black man and a pepperoni pizza? One can actually feed a family of 4.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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What do you call love at first sight? A broken heart.

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How did the fat guy servive the plane crash??????? He bounced

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what did the indian boy say to his friend? I wish you were real

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The Dane, the Norwegian and the Chinese where on a plane, and as the plane was malfunctioning, the pilot would shout: "We are overloaded! Toss out everything you can spare!" The Dane tossed out a box of Danish Salami, explaining they had enough of those in his country. The Norwegian tossed out a package of sweaters, explaining that they had enough of those in his country. Suddenly the Chinese jumped out without a given explanation, as time passed though, the surviving crew arrived to some conclusions... Moral: R.I.P Kim the 294834839483948th

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Why Did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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Bill and John are talking about types of cheese. The conversation drags on a bit and slowly changes topic. Bill says "I bet you I can bungy jump off a bridge". John chuckles before replying "I bet you can't". They go and find a bridge and Bill puts on his harness and ties himself to the side of the bridge. He throws himself off the edge and falls through the air screaming at the top of his voice. John cuts the bungy cord and Bill dies.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. Dave then complied, opened the door and let the police search his house. He was then found innocent of drug related charges.

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What do you get when you put a pig in an oven? A dead pig.

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why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

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there is a blonde, red head, and brunet held captive in afghanistan. The people say whats your last word to the red head, she says tornado... they turned and she escaped, they say to the brunet what is your last word, she says tsunami.. they turn and she escaped. They go to the blonde and say what is your last word, she says fire... she is then shot rapidly and she dies.

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What do you get when you cross Jesus with James Woods? Crucifixion

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Why were the 3 men wearing black suits? They just left their mothers funeral, she died of terminal cancer.

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yo mamas so fat she probably has to wear a gerdle when she leaves the house.

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. It was the chickens decision thus, not affecting your life greatly. You should therefore mind your own business and let the chicken live his life with capability of using it's rights.

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What do a book and a tractor have in common? Both are for driving, except the book.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree," "Are you a tree?" "No."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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