Q. whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A. A jew is a human of the jewish religion, and a pizza is food.

Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

What hurts worse than a papercut? Divorce.

what do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

So a guy walks into a bar. He asks the woman next to him, ''Can I buy you a drink?'' The woman says,''No thank you.''

have you seen ray charles' house? neither has he.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

Yesterday I was diagnosed with Depression... It made me sad.

A man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with his next-door neighbor. Furious, he shouts 'What's the meaning of this?!' And his wife answers 'A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing close at hand or being indicated or experienced'.

ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE!? YES I AM, AH! ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE?! The judge did not find the Elton John song worthy of negating the statuary rape charges and sentenced him to nine years in jail.

Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/popular/a-paper-cut-is-a-trees-last-revenge

What do you call an asian woman with one leg? By her name.

What did the brown guy say to the black person when he got fired? Nothing, did you think this was going to be racist or something?!

My computer crashed today I was watching porn.

What is worse than a person eating cereal? A black person eating white children.

What's the best time to visit a dentist? Generally every six months or so.

What did Mars say to warn Prehistoric Earth before an asteroid hit it? Nothing, sound can't travel through space, it's a vacuum. The dinosaurs will be missed.

I'm wet Ew you perv.. Stop thinking like that ! I just took a shower.

A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

What is not a crocodile? The teenage mutant ninja turtles

How do you kill a blonde? There are countless ways to complete such a task all of which have infinite variations.

A priest a rabbi and the dalai lama walk into a bar. They decided to order the hotwings...... Why do u care??? : )

Doctor, doctor, it hurts when I hit my head with a hammer!! Dont hit your head with a hammer anymore.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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