Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: A deaf guy

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What do you call a guy eating a sandwich? Whatever his name is.

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How do you blind fold an asian? Dental floss!

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your mummas so ugley that it looks like it court fire and your family put it out with forkes

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What is brown and gurgles? dead baby casserole

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What is worse then finding repeated jokes on anti jokes? finding a womr in your apple

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why was the boy sad because he had a cat stapled to his face

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Two women are sitting next to each other in a bar minding their own business.

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Know what people hated the most? 9-11

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Titanic with will smith. Girl: I wont ever let go of you. Leo: Drowns. Smith: Move your fat ass over girl, there is like room for me and fifthy kids there yo! Me: Bitch if you need to float on a piece of wood where six of us could fit, im gonna drown you.

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Why did the corpse come to life? Because number 5 is alive!

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What do grass and cows have in common? They both say "moo" except for grass

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How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

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How come Dorothy couldn't feel her legs? The metal cable snapped.

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What's the best part of a family reunion? The sodomy.

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In Soviet Russia life had both pros and cons.

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Why did Sally's Ice Cream melt? Sally was on Fire

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Why are you on anti joke? Because your not funny enough to make your own jokes

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How many walls can you paint with a baby? Depends on how hard you throw it.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? EVERYWHERE

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A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

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Why did lil' Jimmy fall off his bike? The weight ratio between the left and right sections of his body became uneven due to some sort of change in the traction of the tires to the bumps on the road/ path.

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Two hippos are in a lake with water up to their eyes. One of them then says, "i keep thinking it's tueday"

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What is the difference between a black man and a speed bump? A black man is a living thing and a speed bump is not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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