Why did the father not text back? He died in a car crash

why do i love my iphone because its a very versatile electronic device with many uses and i can get the anti-joke app

what happens when u mix a car, a blimp and a plane? I don't know.

Yo' Momma is so fat she weighs a lot!

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

Knock Knock whose there brian Brian who oh because im chinese you assume my second name is Hu? terribly sorry theres been a misunderstanding, i was asking you surname, i should have been more specific! No it my fault, i dont know why i overreacted my second name is Hu its ok, what can i do for you? is it allright to come in for some noodles? are you paying? only a reasonable price ok then, dont see why not

3 men walk into a bar. they all take a cab home to keep from having an accident due to their intoxication.

why did the computer crash? it didn't

What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

What did johanne buy when she got pregnant? A staircase

a little boy takes his lacrosse stick to his mom and says "hey mom this is bob" the mom says "hi bob" and she says to her son "does bob say hi back?" and the boy says "no mom. hes a lacrosse stick."

Q. What is small, ugly and severely asthmatic? A. My younger brother. Jimmy.

Roses are red, Violets are green, get in my bed, if you know what I mean.

There was a man sinking in quick sand. He looked in the sky and said, "God, if you spare my life, I'll be a great person and believe in you all my life." He died.

Feeling that your friends do not listen to your insightful conversations? BUY A PARROT! Teach it to say "Uhuh", and "Ahah", and "Dats coo!" NOW YOU CAN BE COMPLETELY APRECIATED BY A FUCKING BIRD THAT DOES NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE SAYING... ...BUT IS IT... APPRECIATING IT? DUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN! MYSTERY!

How did the black man cross the road after 5 years of trying to and getting hit by cars every time? some1 put KFC on the other side. MrBounty44

A blonde and a brunette nearly fell off a cliff and were hanging on for dear life. The brunette found the strength to climb back onto the ledge. The blonde was impressed and had muscular dystrophy so she lost the strength to hold on any longer and fell to her death.

What's the difference between a Corvette and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

What's the difference between victims of Brady and Hindley and a pile of dead babies? Some were born dead and the others were raped then killed.

Grammer is very important

What did the Egyptian helicopter do when it went into the pyramid? Exploded.

How many kids with Asperger's does it take to change a light bulb? Tyrannosaurus lived in the Cretaceous Period.

Why is paper white? Cause that's how they make paper.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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