Why didn't the gangster cross the road? Because he J-walked and was hit by a car.

Two blondes get in a taxi. Who's driving? The taxi driver.

What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Is that rash contagious?

Why the kid can't get off the water? Because your feet is on his head

Ok, I have a knock knock joke for ya.......you start.

How do you kill a retard You give em a kinfe and ask who's special

Whats the difference between a sandwhich and a dead baby? People eat sandwhiches.

What do you call a black cop? Officer.

Two birds fly onto a bench. They cherp 3 times and sit there enjoying the nice weather.

Wanna hear a joke? The WNBA

The only difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer is the taste.

what did the blond do after she turned 18? Reelected Obama.

So tell me what’s worse than a baby? A dead baby… Well then what’s worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a pile of dead babies? A live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies? A live baby eating it’s way out of a pile of dead babies…

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car> "Get in the car."

Tell you something funny.

why did ya dad eat ya food?? because ya sister

What do you call a room full of lawyers? A group of legally educated professionals.

A gay man walks into a biker bar and orders a drink. The bartender says "Hey, you want ice with that?"

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

you

What do you call a man man with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? Bob(he is bobbing in the water)

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey. Why did the other bird fall out of the tree? It was shot. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

What's dried up and smells like potatoes? Potato ships and school french fries.

What kind of car does Yoda drive? Nothing, Yoda doesn't exist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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