Bill:Ask me to do something. Bob:Go get me a beer Bill:Would you like fries with that?

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A chickens walks into a bar... And greets her fellow friends

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was michael jackson black or white? how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie poop? the world will never know

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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What do you call red eyes in the dark? A high black man

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Three guys went barhopping. One slipped and broke his dick.

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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Four men were walking, and three of them walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? It fell.

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What's worse than a bee sting? Getting shot in the head

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Q: Why did the boy go to the orphanage? A: His parents were dead.

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What did the disabled boy get on Christmas morning? Cancer.

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Your dad is so bald, that a various number of people compliment him on how well shaven his head is.

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Roses are red, But ravens are black, please go to China, and never come back!

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

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How many Aumish farmhands does it take to operate a state of the art commercial laser-cutter? One,provided he has the relevant training and experience.

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George: I see you got a haircut. Jim: No, I got them all cut.

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Nicholas Salek did not write the message below. It was a joke one of his mates played!!

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

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How do you make a frog stand still? Shoot it.

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Can you answer one question for me? Yes Thank you

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hardy har har.. i should be working on a school project right now!!

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What's the difference between you and a cat? The cats mom isn't a whore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops