roses are red but violets are definately violet what retard made this rhyme

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What advice did the cat give to the man? Nothing because it's a cat.

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A black guy is lying on the floor dead with a knife next to him, what killed him? Multiple bullets sprayed from an uzi being held by a rival gang member....

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have you seen Britney Spears lately? no. i wouldn't expect you to since she is a pop sensation and you are just a regular person trying to find your way in this world

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What did the Rabbi say to the priest? The holocaust was real and it tore apart my family.

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, but Im on bath salts, and you're face looks tasty;)

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Yoshy is gay and likes men. From Jarod ????

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What did Winnie the Pooh say to Eeyore? Nothing, he just suffocated him in a pot of honey.

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? Same ones he got last year.

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How do you get a Blonde to switch seats with you? Ask her politely.

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Why did your mom cross the street? She didn't. She was a home. Making me a sandwhich.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Heath Ledger.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police, your entire family has died in a terrible car accident.

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What's the difference between a woman and a car? A woman is merely a useful object, whereas a car deserves love, care, and respect.

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Why did the black man skip every other step on the stairs? Because he had long legs and it was faster.

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Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

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Q: How do you make a cat bark? A: Douse it in gasoline and throw it in a fire.........WOOF!!!!

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why was the kid sad? his fish died. he had to flush it down the toilet.

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How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? No amount of them could ever figure it out. They all tremble with fear in the dark.

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A black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving Their designated driver who they carefully selected as someone they thought had enough self-control to not drink and could get both of them home safely

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I'll give you a nickel to lick my pickle, a dime to take your time and a quarter if I can f*ck you in the ass

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WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

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What's worse than genital warts? Herpes. You can get rid of warts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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