Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

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Tell somebody that someone told you they look like an owl. When they say "Who?" laugh in their face

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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This is my firstever post so I wanted to make it very specialand have it really mean something, then I though fark that for a joke

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder lately? No? Neither has he.

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9/11

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How did the black man get out of the bathroom? He opened the door.

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What's green and fuzzy and would hurt a lot if it fell out of a tree and hit you? A pool table

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Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

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What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

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Miss Polly had a Dolly who was sick sick sick So she called for the Doctor to come quick quick quick The doctor came with his bag and his hat And he knocked on the door with a rat-tat-tat. He looked at Polly's Dolly and he shook his head. He said she had leprosy and must have all her limbs amputated.

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What is worse than the Holocaust? a Michael Bay movie

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Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

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Im ashamed of being from Canada

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

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What's white and sticky? Glue.

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How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

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Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

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two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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