What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

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What's worse than breaking your arm? Not having any arms.

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Who is yellow and cant drive straight. A man dying of lukemia

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

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Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

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Roofs are Red...I have a Cunt!!!

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Why was the Mexican sleeping? He wishes to decrease his risk of motor vehicle accidents.

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How did Allen Iverson compose one of the most well known interviews of all time? Practice.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

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How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

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why was the black guy running from the cops? i dont know either

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

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Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

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What's sad about 3 black people going over a cliff in a Cadillac? Cadillac's seat 6

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why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

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How many dead babies can you fit a bathtub??? It depends on how you slice them!

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your momma's so stupid, she starved to death in a supermarket i probably would too...considering all the good shit needs to be cooked

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops