What do you get if you cross a human and a cow? Arrested.

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How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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Why did the man run over Suzy? He was a serial killer

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If you walked into a grocery store right in the middle of Cuba what won't you see? The missing Malaysian MH370 Boeing.

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What's worse than stepping on a nail? stepping on the nail and falling on more nails face first.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

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I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

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You're a fat chubby McChubchub fatty fatchub because your fat chubby McChubchubfattychub poop is on your fatty fat Mcphat face of fatchubness because you are the fatty lord of McChubby fat kings.

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Knock Knock. To get to the other side.

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

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What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

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Major League Soccer

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My grandma's star sign was cancer, and it was really ironic how she died, actually... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Why is it scientifically proven that even Spider-Man would be a match for Superman? Because none exist. Moral: The only Super Hero... not scientifically proven, but I exist so that makes me stronger than both of them!

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The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

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Jims family is having a picnic. Jim goes and gets his food. shortly after he drops his food. Jim is really sad and goes and gets more food. Jim is black

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If Jimmy in New York has 2 apples, and Tommy in Denver has 4 apples, what is the mass of the sun? 1.989E30 kg.

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How do you put a baby in a blender? Feet first, so you can see its expression. How do you get a baby out of a blender? With chips.

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whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

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A cat walks into a bar, the bartender says "pussy?"

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Who is JP? A really smart kid! HAHA jk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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