Why couldn't the boy hide his penis? Circumcision.

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Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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what is the difference of a bag of dead babies and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline

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Q: how do you test the sharpness of a knife A: stab someone MR

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Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

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Two little boys are talking to each other: - My dad's dick is soo biig! - Eh, my dad's dick is small but it still hurts...

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Q: What is the difference between Jimmy and a kite A: Jimmy is higher MR

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Q. Whats red and smells like blue paint? A. Wheres my tractor?

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to make the bed? How many Alzheimer patients does it take to make the bed? How many Alzheimer patients does it take to make the bed? How ma......

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How does a chubby baby eat his chili In a very chubby way with his hands smearing it all over is face

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Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

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roses are red violets are puffy i am a donkey i ate some water

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Why did the shark attack the rock? Because it thought it was a human.

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Why is a cat in the desert like Christmas? Because Egypt is a country of deserts, the Egyptians had cats and Jesus, Mary and Joseph escaped to Egypt in the Christmas story before Herod carried out his massacre in Bethlehem on baby boys of under two years old.

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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I was expecting something like that... Anyway, good you do not mind in particular, because that means I am just boring myself here, so, tell me something about yourself you don't tell people most.

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What's black and white and enforces the rules at football games? A referee? Wow you're really smart.

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why did your mom die? Cuz i killed her

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a short term memory Roses are red

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Why did the girl cry when her boyfriend brought up the topic about rape? Because she was raped by her father as a child and it was a suppressed memory.

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red Watermelons are green Refridgerator

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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