What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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What did the traffic light say to the car? dont look at me am changing.

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a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

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Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

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Everybody love food when they are hungry

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What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

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Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

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How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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You know what they say about a man's feet... No i don't.

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What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

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Knock,Knock Who's there? The Police, Your under arrest for urinating on a toliet.

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What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

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Darth Vader: Luke, I am your father! Luke: You're not my dad!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHA PENIS

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How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

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A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

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A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

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If somebody stabs you in the forehead, you are likely to get injured.

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops