What did the smiley face say to the other smiley face? Nothing. They just smiled.

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A man didn't feel well so he went to the toilet. He had explosive diahrria, then felt better.

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What did the rock say to the tree. It didn't say anything, rocks don't talk.

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A vampire sees a werewolf at a bar, aware of the upcoming brawl between them two, the bartender shoots them both in the head but it's okay because neither of them exist.

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every time I stay in the water too long my pp gets all shriverly sometimes can't find it omg that's so weird

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what Did The Cow Say To The Chicken, Moo

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I believe if Floyd Mayweather fought Muhammad Ali I believe it would be a close fight but Floyd would win. Because Ali has Parkinson's

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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What did the transvestite say to the hypochondriac? "Ever been to Toledo?"

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What did the genie say to the man that rubbed the magic lamp? Nothing, genies don't exist.

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Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

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These are some questions you should never ask on a first date: When you wipe do you throw your toilet tissue in the toilet or on a trash can? Do you smell your hands after you wipe? Do you you ever look down when you take a dump and see it come out? Have you ever picked your butt and then picked your nose with the same finger?

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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed? She got kicked in the face by a mule.

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A lepord can carry two times its weight into a tree, i dont have a joke for this yet but youll leave here learning something.

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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Why did the man walk up to a bank teller with a gun? He is the security guard; he wanted to ask her for financial advice.

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What's worse than finding a snake in your apple? Finding a snake in your apple

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A blind man walks into a bar After realising he might be hurt everybody rushes to his aid

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When geese fly in the V formation why is there always one side longer than the other? Because theres more geese on that side.

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Where did the cow go? To the slaughter house!!!

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Why do people hate Jews? Because there is nothing to like about them

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how did helen keller's parents punish her? stuck a plunger in the toilet

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

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What do you call a sheep? something to have sex with.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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