Your mom is so fat, she had liposuction.

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What's the difference between a poodle and a noodle? Scaboodle!

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Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can do whatever the hell it wants

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Why did the chicken open door? It can't. Chickens don't have hands.

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Why couldn't the black man participate in the running category of the Olympics? Because he had no legs, he was referred to the Special Olympics, instead.

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What did Batman's mother say when it was time for dinner? Nothing, Batman's parents are dead.

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Q)What is the best way to get the bitches? A) You shouldn't try. You could go to prison on bestiality charges.

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3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

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How come little billy couldn't ride a tricycle? Because he was born without legs due to a rare disease and therefore can't pedal.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

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When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Frances. Frances who? Frances Payne.

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Q. What do you get when you cross a bird with a human? A. Arrested.

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Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

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general tso's broccoli

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A guy asks, "Why was my mom in your bed?" The other guy replies, "Because your mom has a mental disease which inhibits her ability to process thought."

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the second monkey.

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops