Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.

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What's the worst part about rollerblading? Telling your dad that you're gay.

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You know what's funnier than 24? 25

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Why did Jenny fail her photography class? Because Jenny has epilepsy and she had a coma while taking the final exam. To this day Jenny is drain dead in the hospital.

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McDonald. It's run by Lawers

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Yeah your point? Anyway, so then the brain surgeon goes: I have have cut into thousands of brains, and never seen a single thought.

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How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

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There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to his mother's funeral.

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What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

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Why was Carlos fired? Because he stole and smelled of weed.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

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Alot of people try to make shitty jokes on this webpage, thinking they're funny. They aren't.

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have u ever have to clean up ur own poop? me niether.

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender. How do you get them out? Well you shouldn't. Leave the car in front of somebody that you hate's house.

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What is worse than menopause? Falling down the stairs breaking your next....

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Whats black and can multitask? My IPod you racist!

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A doctor walks into a bar. It's his day off and decides to celebrate after a long week of working.

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The grandfather's grandson said, "They charged me $10 just for a cup of coffee!" The grandfather said, "They charged me with bayonets."

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What did the woman say when she lost her purse? Where's my purse?

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What is green and has wheels A blue bucket, I lied about the green and the wheels

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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3 guys walks into a park. Which one was holding the beer? None, all 3 guys were elementary kids

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops