What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

Q. What did the pedophile get when he went to jail? A. Exactly what he wanted.

A man adopts an orphan. He waits till the child is a teenager to tell the news. He then commits suicide as to scar the child emotionally for the rest of its life.

What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

what is the diffrence between a chinesse man and a japanesse man, one is ruled by a cruel communist leader.

Do you ride the bus to school or do you take your lunch?

Whats the difference between a bong and a nigger? My bong works

Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

A man walks into a bar... he is blind so it isn't funny

Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

Three men walked into a bar. None were injured because they were all wearing hard hats as is the procedure for a construction site.

What do you call a boy with no arms? Names.

On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Carl -Carl wh-wait... carl...CARL OH MY GOD!!!! WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD ,CARL!!!! Where have you been? Oh my god... Mom's DEAD! When we all thought you were dead she hung herself! IT'S YOUR FAULT SHE'S DEAD, CARL! YOUR FAULT!!!!!! YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT CARL! YOU KNOW THAT? I hope you burn in hell.

What's the difference between a Corvette and a sack of dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

why did Samantha fall off the building? She was hit by a flying fridge dropped by a traffic helicopter.

Irish man English man and a Scottish man all in a plane they jump out then they land

What's sad about 5 black men falling off a cliff? The master has no slaves.

A baby seal walks into a club.

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

who holds the world record for longest amount of time on fire? Jim Rome

Knock knock Who's there? Not you

What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

Why did the boy wear glasses? Because he had bad eyesight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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