What do you get when you cross a jack-o-lantern and an antelope? Nothing. You wouldn't see an antelope by a pumpkin.

I like to rape children, then kill them, eat them and defecate them into a toilet

What's The Difference Between A Refridgerator And The Holocaust ? Not Much.

what did the elephant step on when he was running through the jungle? .... a coke machine.

What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting a needle shoved into your penis and the needle hitting your scrotum so that you are in serious agony for hours and finding out you cannot have kids because of it.

Knock knock. Who's there? Meals on wheels - eat up!

What's cooler than living on the sun? Everything, because the sun is the hottest entity in the entire universe. Plus, who'd want to live on the sun?

Your mom is so ugly that she was mercilessly bullied throughout high school which led to severe depression and low self-esteem, however she went to college, got a career, found a man who loved her for who she is, not how she looks, and raised a family happily ever after.

Why was Little Billy sad? Because he got shot.

Knock knock, Who's there The delivery man The delivery man who Just take this package

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Pizza guy. Just a minute, I have to grab my wallet.

pauls tuck

Q: What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Cancer

What did the homeless guy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's homeless.

Q; Why did the gas station attendant scream when 3 black men walked into his store? A: It was his surprise birthday party.

Is your refrigerator running? No. That is highly improbable because a refrigerator has no arms or legs, also a refrigerator is not a human being, or alive in any manor and therefor cannot be moved with out an external force acted upon it.

Q: What did the blonde woman say when she got slaped by her friend? A: Ow.

im at school

What did the ant say when he walked in the club. . . Nothing he was immediately stepped on.

What did 7 say to 6? I hear you've been spreading stories about me.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

How do you get a one armed Pollack out of a tree? Hold his family at gunpoint.

learn the ropes?

Scientific fact: If you took all the veins from your body and laid them end to end, you would die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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