I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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A man walks into a bar. He sees his wife with another man. That man is his brother.

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obamas trench

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Q) You know how I know your gay A) Cuz your gay

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How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

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Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

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You're a wizard Harry! I am?

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

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What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

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Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

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Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

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banana

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, leaving her unable to respond to external stimuli and thus unlikely to able to pass a basic driving test.

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Why did my cat die? I drowned it in the bath.

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Sheesh people! Stop insulting my last comment! Do not GO into my comment section, I do not WANT YOU to keep thumbing up those that call me pedo. Moral: Norway... you gonna call us all pedophiles? Please... besides I prefer them over nineteen... the downside is that they often got a couple of kids already at that age... Sigh...

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

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The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

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Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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