Q: Why did the singer stop singing? A: Someone threw a car at her face.

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How did Bob fall off the swing? He had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? He had no arms. What did Bob get for Christmas? Cancer.

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I scream You scream We all scream For dead babies

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Whats black and smells like white paint? A) Black paint!

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I ate high protein foods and now my flatulence smells wrank.

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen Bug? Four, maybe 3, depending on the size of each person.

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Get your coat, I've got a knife.

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Why did the girl fall off a cliff? Because it was an Anti-Joke.

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There's two men on a subway. One says "Hey, that's my sandwich.".

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What does a plum and a rabbit have in common? A: they're both purple, except for the rabbit!

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? 124

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John: Hey Bill, ORANGE you in the mood to go to a Phillies game? Bill: Yes! So let's make like a banana and raise our potassium levels drastically and leave right away to beat the rush hour traffic.

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What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

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the asian kid gets an F

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Why did the woman walk into the men's clothing store? She's a lesbian. Why did the man walk into the womens clothing store? He had to buy his mom a birthday present.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

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So Jimmy's phsycology teacher is trying to think of beginnig lessons for her phsycology class. so she gets up and says "class, i want u anyone who thinks they are stupid to stand up." nobody stood up. then Jimmy stands up. The teacher says "Jimmy, u think u are stupid?" Jimmy replies "No, i just felt bad with u standing up all alone."

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why are black people good at basketball? because they practice

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why did kurt cobain kill himself? He was experiencing heavy depression

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When Life gives you lemons, Make Orange Juice!

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What's big, grey and can't climb a tree? A parking lot

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A Black man, a Mexican, and a Midget, get in a car. They drive to the county fair and get snow cones and have a really fun time.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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