Why did dave not hug his wife? becuase he said she looked horrifying from the war in iraq.

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yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

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whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

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Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

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What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

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Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

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I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

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I am a mime

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Q:your jetski loses a wheel. how many pancakes does it take to fix your house? A:blue berry icecream.

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How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

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Why did Jack like oranges? - Penis

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A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

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Yo mama so old, she must take arthritus medicine to keep out of extreme pain.

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

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what do you make if you get a cow, then kill it. ...Steak

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A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

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A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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