How do you stop a black kid from jumping around in your bedroom? Chuck him out of the house.

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Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

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Why can't Stevie wonder read? He can. He reads braille.

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Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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Whats worse than Sandy Hook Massacre? 9/11

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A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

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if you have a name/nickname/brand/version or number, please like this anti joke

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A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

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How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

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what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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A Jew buys something that is not on sale

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, but if the ladder is shaky, you might need another to hold it up.

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guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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