What did the women get after valentines day? An abortion.

Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

SHUT UP JP

Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

what did the fish say when i threw it at the wall. Ouch. Then the world ended because it caused a ripple in the fabric of reality.

A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

Three black men was in a car. They were going on holiday.

roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

Dead girls can't say no.

Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

what do you get when you you put a knife in a head? a dead body

In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

why did the girl fall off the swing..? because she became unbalanced and the force of gravity extended on her was too great to prevent the fall

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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