What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Guess what! What? huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu

thumb_up thumb_down +5

roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

thumb_up thumb_down +5

hwhy did the monkey fall out of the tree? he got shot. why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? he was nailed to the first one.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than being short? Being a Tutsi in 1994.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A Jew walking in the street sees a homeless person asking for charity. He reaches to his pocket, grabs a penny, greets her with a nice smile and gives away the penny.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why wasnt nathan invited the party? nathan's been dead for 5 years

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I am thinking of a number between 1 and 100 what is it There are many numbers between 1 and 100 so it is highly unlikely that I will guess the right number

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you get when you cross a penis with a dinosaur? A dicklodocus.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

An Irish man walks into a bar, and then realizes that he's walked into the wrong establishment (He was looking for an upscale restaurant.)

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A guy says to a palm reader "You look like you've seen a ghost. Palm reader replies "You've got cum on your hand."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats white and goes up? a confused snowflake

thumb_up thumb_down +3

how man

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did superman say when he flew into a building? Flying is inhumanly possible unless in an aircraft vehicle.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops