What did Anne Frank say to the German Officer? Nothing. She had to keep quiet in a cramp attic in order to survive.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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Question:Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Answer:Because she had no arms or legs. Question:What did little Susie get for Christmas? Answer: a bike, and cancer Question: what did little Susie get next Christmas? Answer: nothing, she didn't live that long... Knock knock Who's there Not little Susie

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Why did the boy fall off his skateboard before running into a cross-section? Because he was shot.

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The american education system.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

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What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

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Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

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Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

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Yo' Mama is so fat, her driver's license says, "picture continued on other side."

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What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

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Good job, son.

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Why are you asking me this question? That's awful and you should be ashamed of yourself.

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why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

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What was the last thing the boy heard before he was hit by the school bus? Nothing. He was deaf.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

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Wanna hear a hot headed retard? call and listen carefully 6196342668

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What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops