What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

A black man bites into a watermelon. Just kidding he was white.

What did Stephen Hawking say after he scaled Mount Everest? Yay!

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

My mother has great posture. She's paralyzed from the neck down.

A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

What's red and can't find a family? A fire hydrant

Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

Why can't a T-rex clap its hands? It's extinct.

knock knock whos there. no one your hullicinating, heroine is hell of a drug

Dylan: "I dont understand anti-jokes"

Why couldn't the Muslim eat pork? He didn't have a tongue.

Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

A: Knock Knock B: Who's There? Person B came down with a serious case of amnesia that day and can't remember who anyone is.

"My father walked out on me." "Oh that's strange because I saw him yesterday and he had no legs."

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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